Poetry and personal blog – Spilling my guts to strangers

The Tao of Butter

Times are desperate, and frankly, I’m feeling a bit stressed and afraid I’m losing my mojo. Today, I’m looking to my darling cats, Butter and Marmalade, for some answers. I’ll talk about Marmalade in depth sometime in the future. This post will mainly focus on Butter and the top 3 things I learn from him.

Before you conclude I’ve gone off my rocker, let me say I know that my pets can only do so much to ease the pain of all that is troubling me. Specifically, the stories of survival and hope from Haiti are amazing, but the situation there is still dismal. Then there was the epic fail of a senate race this past Tuesday in Massachusetts that puts health care reform in jeopardy. Plus, there is mayhem and upheaval at my job.

Also, my cats are not the brightest. I used to have a smart cat when I was a girl. His name was Pokey. He had a noble carriage and always behaved appropriately within the context of the family. His eyes seemed to convey human intelligence. He died of old age, but if only he could have lived a little bit longer. I truly believe he was only a few years away from walking upright and ordering mango salsa.

Actually, this brings me to number 3 on the top three things I learn from Butter:

3) Ignorance is bliss

This is Butter. Honestly, I don’t really think ignorance is bliss but that phrase makes a good subtitle. However, I must say, it doesn’t hurt to take a break from the heaviness of life once in a while. Clear your head. Think of nothing. Meditate, as Butter is doing in this pic, or watch some reality tv.

2) Get plenty of rest, preferably in an unmade bed

If you can, do most of your sleeping during the day, although this is only possible if you have someone who will faithfully feed you, pet you, and clean your toilet. In the evenings, sit on different people’s laps and take naps, making sure you spread the sleepy love. Be most active at night and the loudest right before dawn.

1) Allow others to sniff your anus (not pictured)

Both cats and dogs sniff each other’s butts by way of greeting and to get information about how the other is doing; I don’t know what other animals do in this regard. As for Butter, he is comfortable in his own skin and is not ashamed to reveal himself.

On this front I have much to learn, but for now, I offer you my intellectual anus for your olfactory perusal. If you want to sniff my real ass, you must pay me quite a bit, or marry me. Or bring over expensive snacks.

Deep breath … exhale. Yes, I’m feeling a lot better now.

© Sweepy Jean and Sweepy Jean Explores the (Webby) World, 2010.


Comments on: "The Tao of Butter" (22)

  1. Ha ha.. In the world I live in, there is actually quite a bit of ass sniffing that goes on (ROFLMAO). The ones I’m most comfortable with are the ones that think enough about the other person to prepare it before any olfactory perusal begins. maybe that should have been your 1A: Shit happens, but if you clean up as you go, it’s better for everyone involved!

    • Lol! Well, if it’s all cleaned up, there’s no information in that. I imagine that it depends on what you’re sniffing (brains or butts), what you’re sniffing for, and if it’s only sniffing you want, though to each his own. Maybe some people are comfortable with no special preparation? It’s not alway possible and not always preferable, but sometimes you have to show your ass the way it is.

  2. I have learnt so much from my cat ‘Spicey’ who is 13 this Feb, but the most valuable lesson he has taught me, is acceptance. Spicey accepts everything and he does not argue with anything and therefore he does not suffer.This is different to ignorance – there is awareness, and then acceptance. From this, I have also learnt that there is no such thing as should or shouldn’t. It is raining outside and that is the reality. When I accept this reality then I am okay. When I argue with this reality and say ‘oh but it shouldn’t be raining’ – then I suffer. The earthquake in Haiti beggars belief, and your job sounds tedious and maddening, but everything is transient and nothing ever stays the same. To argue with the present reality does nothing whatsoever- except cause you to suffer. Acceptance is the best advice my old cat ever gave me.
    Love the blog Sweepy Jean, keep on writing!

    • These are wise words, Misha. I definitely think Spicey has an excellent attitude. Taking it one step further, you comments remind me of the so-call serenity prayer:

      God grant me the serenity
      to accept the things I cannot change;
      courage to change the things I can;
      and wisdom to know the difference.

      We may not be able to change what happened in Haiti, but we can help. As for my job, maybe I need to find the courage to leave!

  3. As a borderline crazy-cat-widow (add creepy in there too) I dig ya honey.

    Here is what I’m observing in my current three, and what I may or may not take from them in regard to potential future relationships:

    Suggie: A bi-polar mix of aloof indifference, and puppy like stalking.

    Bitz: A constant clingy need for affection. When removal from lap is attempted the claws come out.

    Spankie the kitten: Run around with your butt up in the air presenting yourself to anyone who might be able to help you out with your “problem”, even inanimate objects.

    I think if I mix them all together, I’ll be like every other peer woman dealing with a “baby-daddy” out there…so I have goals…

    =) Hope that made you smile. Butt sniffed, approval given, licks of the ears sent!


    The Widow

    (BTW notice, I finally got made an account, and signed in so I could post here properly! Love ya Sweepy!)

    • Lol! That’s funny cause Marmalade is neurotic too. Her post would be about what not to do. Are your cats all female? Hmmm… :-0

      Your comments were coming through ok before, and now there’s no link to your blog in your posts. You may want to reconsider.

  4. See the problem with being an efffing blond Sweepy…I never thought about there not being a link to me here, if I signed in on wordpress LMAO! You gotta keep me in line I swear. I have a male cat, Winston, is his name…but due to space, I have to adopt him and Bella both out…long story. The three I have in house at the moment are all women-ish–kind of like me (‘cept Spanky) they have their junk cut out LOL. Love ya honey!

  5. See the problem with being an efffing blond Sweepy…I never thought about there not being a link to me here, if I signed in on wordpress LMAO! You gotta keep me in line I swear. I have a male cat, Winston, is his name…but due to space, I have to adopt him and Bella both out…long story. The three I have in house at the moment are all women-ish–kind of like me (‘cept Spanky) they have their junk cut out LOL. Love ya honey!

  6. Ha ha – the guru of your cat. Quite true actually (about the sleeping and ignorance bit). Not quite so sold on the ass-sniffing bit though, that could cause quite a few socially uncomfortable moments 🙂 Maybe you could write a new-age-self-help-type-book based on the wisdom of butter. Sounds promising to me 😉

  7. ..hahah or shoul it be LOLcats. sniffing each other also maybe to determine who is snitching on the other

  8. Nice post. I think that usually we humans do a lot of our “ass-sniffing” via conversation. (Though maybe the cat way is more reliable?)It’s easy to envy the cats ability to relax anywhere they happen to find themselves. Do you read any Billy Collins? He has a poem on a similiar theme (dog rather than cat though) Check it out:

    • Hi, Brent! Thanks for sharing this poem, it’s beautiful. I had not read a lot from our former poet laureate. If only we humans could get our priorities straight!

  9. As a recently retired Golden Retriever breeder and owner of four dogs, a host of cats and two Arabian mares– only one dog living directly with me at present– the other with my “wasband”– he who was to have been my husband, you brought back things I have found hilarious and distracting. such as: one day staggering down the path along our creek leading two recalcitrant “tied” dogs– yep– hooked up. I put them in a kennel and they stayed that way for hours. And, the stallion that bred my mare and then promptly fell asleep on her back….and, Randy Mandy, my Jack Russell, who humps my Golden Tess’s face when she is in heat: you should see Tess’s expression….. very good, very funny, keep ’em coming; you and I are definitely on same page with the darkness issue vs. lightening up; we must tell the truth but find the humor in it, no? best j

    • Looks like you may have the secret of life figured out with all of your pets imparting so much wisdom! Yes, suspect we are on the same page as far as exposing the truth; if it takes humor to do it, then fine. By any means … Thanks, Jenne’

  10. LOL!! Your (smart) kitty and my turtle share a name. 🙂 This was a great post for the prompt. Thanks for joining in Smiley Sociology Study #4! 🙂

  11. I’ve never heard of an intellectual anus. Very clever 🙂

    • I think it’s like picking someone’s brain except less painful! :p I’m glad you stopped by. I very much enjoyed my visit to your site!

  12. Yippeee.. another cat person! Butter sounds like a great cat to snuggle with on a lazy, rainy day.
    Great post.

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